Epic Fail = Watchmen
IrritatedWatchmen was not at all as kick ass as the commercials allow us to think. It's a nearly three hour movie that seems almost 'stream of conscious'. It attempts to fill you in one everything that's been going on and such, but it ends up taking up most of the movie and leave little other time to portray any real plot in the current setting. Well, current for them. Nixon was still in office. -snort- In any case, the lack of plot through most of the movie is not the biggest problem. What is a rather neon problem is Dr. Manhattan's blue penis showing up every other scene. Honestly, I have nothing against viewing male anatomy and all, but after a while you have to wonder why he's walking around naked everywhere and much more, why can't he use the bottoms he has. He wears them all of two scenes more or less, and then there's two scenes when he's dressed in a suit, but then the next clip goes right back to the blue dick of doom. The only character I even felt remotely interested with in the move was Rorschach. And he ends up dying in the end because he won't sacrifice his morals for some half-assed plan you don't really know is happening at all till maybe the last twenty minutes of the movie. Before that, while giving no hints of this master ending plan, there's just a lot of sex, Dr. Manhattan being, to sum it up easily, Emo, and constant flashbacks that make little difference in relation to anything else in the movie. It was as if they were just trying to see how long they could stretch the movie out.
So, overall, it was a disappointment and I don't want to see another neon, glowing penis ever again.
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"I think certain death and dismemberment is in my forecast, followed by a light rain of guts and flayed skin." Kish - Devil May Cry
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*Butcher grabs pigeon and tears it in half*
Creive: "GOD! you took both the Crazy Cake AND the Fugly Pie, I'll give you that!"
Butcher: "so... you don't want your half?"
Creive: "...no..."
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"If I died would you get remarried?"
"Yeah, probably."
"Good. Do me a favor, cremate me when I die and throw my ashes in his face."
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"If I died would you get remarried?"
"Yeah, probably."
"Good. Do me a favor, cremate me when I die and throw my ashes in his face."
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"Christian Fundamentalism: The doctrine that there is an absolutely powerful, infinitely knowledgeable, universe spanning entity that is deeply and personally concerned about my sex life."
XD
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